Ohtani is still in on the Cubs because Theo Epstein is the smartest man alive.

This is a complete mock of mainstream media. I’ve read like 3 articles about Ohtani still considering the Cubs. They’re all wrong.

Sure, you could say the Cubs are one of the best teams in the league. Sure, you could say they have the best young talent in the game. Sure, they have good experience in recruiting foreign players. But, you know what those articles didn’t mention?

This guy. Theo freaking Epstein. Just look at this picture. LOOK AT IT. He’s doing it all in his sleep. I have 0 academic statistics to back this up but, I truly believe that this guy is the smartest man on earth. I don’t even need to explain. Literally turned the Cubs around. Now everyone wants to be here.

So why is Ohtani still considering Chicago? Because of this man right here. Even if Ohtani tells the Cubs he’s out, then Theo still did the right thing. God.

Theo Epstein? More like Theo Einstein.

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